I'm told what I want is a damn retirement dream! It's not a business, it's a pipe dream, it's not viable in today's world. Be happy working a part time or full time crap job out of the fucking house, with people I give not a shit about. Work in the noise, the smells, and sights that make me want to bury my head, and flinch. Work through head aches, cramps that put me in the hospital, and asthma. NNNNOOOO! I want to be fucking useful, not someone people make exceptions for! I want to rotate crops, collect my own eggs, create a haven for animals, myself, and most of all be a mother worth her weight in salt. It's not a hobby, or a dream what I want it's a god damn full time difficult, precious business. I want to cook and teach about farm fresh foods. Why the hell, when people say I have to work, is the response to me talking about having a farm fresh restaurant is why do I fucking want this, is it's so much work. "Why won't you change your mind get a couple chickens, a crap job, two kids, and be a lazy, unhappy bitch, who doesn't care until you're sixty, so the rest of us can be proud of you?" Once again NNNNOOOOO!
